Why don't they make salsa jars shaped like upside down bowls? Its just stupid that the smallest point is at the top. How many people are there who eat salsa out of something other than the jar it comes in? Ryan, shut up of course you have to crap on my point. You lose that delicious salsa juice by putting it in the bowl you idiot. I have no idea why I try to talk to you about my ideas. I'm done. I had other stuff but I'm done. I watched Jackass Number Two tonight and I think we need to start doing more crazy shit. Are you still typing?
*Dictated but not Read*
Monday, June 25, 2012
Monday, June 18, 2012
Godzuki and Cris Carter are Twins
Are you doing it? Okay say I am a big fan of Adam Carolla. I'm not sure if it's like the car, but I know its got two As and two Ls so just do your best. Wait, just put c-a-r-o-l-l-a I think that's right. I'm a big fan of Adam Carolla and he has a gift for saying this person looks like that person and I just remembered my favorite ever that he said. Godzuki, the baby Godzilla looks like Cris Carter the football analyst. Oh my god, best ever. Put up pictures of both. Say 'dictated but not read.' Just always say 'dictated but not read.'
*Dictated but not Read*
 |
| Separated at Birth? |
I'm Drunk, Here We Go
Did you start? Okay, it's another Monday night, but it sure feels like a Thursday night doesn't it? What I mean to say is, I have no perception of time left. My brain is totally fried, but that is the way I like it, or maybe I just don't have the gray matter left to form a real opinion of myself. Either way I'm happy.
I'm writing a book. It's basically an autobiography except that my character is a mutant-human hybrid living in a post-apocalyptic world with a homicidal best friend and an undead fiance... so not super different from what is currently going on. Speaking of currently going on, what is with these crazy bath salts people? My buddy forwarded me the original news story with the subject heading 'Zombie Invasion, Better Buy A Gun'. As an aside, my favorite part of that story is that the guy who's face was eaten- that guy- his family thought he was dead and had thought he was dead for several years. Surprise! It's your lucky... well it's a day... like, a Thursday. Yeah, I did tie it back together. Anyway, I'm going to get a gun. I told my mom this and she said, "Please wait until I'm dead before you buy a gun." and I replied, "If I don't get a gun we'll all be dead, then how will you feel?" I know what you're thinking and, yes, I was on the debate team. Okay I'm done, don't type anything else. No, say 'dictated but not read.' And then that's it.
*Dictated but not Read*
I'm writing a book. It's basically an autobiography except that my character is a mutant-human hybrid living in a post-apocalyptic world with a homicidal best friend and an undead fiance... so not super different from what is currently going on. Speaking of currently going on, what is with these crazy bath salts people? My buddy forwarded me the original news story with the subject heading 'Zombie Invasion, Better Buy A Gun'. As an aside, my favorite part of that story is that the guy who's face was eaten- that guy- his family thought he was dead and had thought he was dead for several years. Surprise! It's your lucky... well it's a day... like, a Thursday. Yeah, I did tie it back together. Anyway, I'm going to get a gun. I told my mom this and she said, "Please wait until I'm dead before you buy a gun." and I replied, "If I don't get a gun we'll all be dead, then how will you feel?" I know what you're thinking and, yes, I was on the debate team. Okay I'm done, don't type anything else. No, say 'dictated but not read.' And then that's it.
*Dictated but not Read*
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)